There’s a lot of cognitive dissonance happening when I think of Chris Brown. He makes catchy music that I objectively like, but at the same time I cannot respect him as an artist or a man. The incident where he savagely beat Rihanna and his response really soured my impression of him and as a result I find it hard to admit I like his creative work. Yet, while I boycotted Chris Brown, I’d listen to other artists I couldn’t respect, just because I liked their music. When my brother played Chris’ new song Loyal for me and I felt guilty for liking it, I had to ask myself why I felt that way about Chris Brown, but not about others.

Now more than ever in this age of social media, we as fans are connected to artists in a such a way that we feel like we really know them. The reality is, that we don’t. I don’t know Chris Brown, I don’t know his life and I don’t know what lead him to beat on a woman like he did. I will never support him, I don’t think his actions paint him as a good person, but who says that all the other artists I listen to are model citizens? They’ve probably done things that would make disappointed or disgusted. I’m not the morality police.

I don’t respect him, I don’t think he’s a good person but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I like his music. I’m still trying to figure out if that makes me a bad person, just human or a combination of the two.